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You Must be Mental

Posted on Sunday 14 October 2018 @ 14:23 by Lieutenant Marbim Rejal & Lieutenant JG Saren Barel

Mission: The New Collective
Location: Main Engineering
2044 words - 4.1 OF Standard Post Measure

"You May be right. I may be crazy. But it just might be a lunatic you're looking for..." - Billy Joel, "You May Be Right"





=/\= "O'Hara t' Saren an' Rejal, Please come t' Engineerin'" =/\=

This shouldn't have been odd in and of itself... What made it so was that Ship's time was 0400 hours.


Saren had gotten up a half hour ago as he had research he needed to do. He tapped his communicator and replied, "On my way."

When they got there, one of the Engineers directed them to her office. The place was a wreck. Save the beanbag chair she was sitting in, every seat, every surface and most of the floor was littered with partially eaten plates of food, half-empty (and cold) cups of Raktijino, And more PADDs than one could count. She currently sat in the beanbag chair, picking at a plate of nachos and drinking coffee as she read a PADD. She had obviously been up all night working on... whatever this was.

Bleary eyed Miles shows up in exercise shorts and a muscle shirt, the scars on his arms and back stand out against the rest of his skin. In one hand he holds a padd, in the other his trusty zero-g mug full of something that smells spicy and sweet..."This better be good Chief, you woke me up from a pleasant dream..."

"Have a seat," She said, not looking up from the PADD that she was currently engrossed in, making notes with a small stylus as she waited for Saren. She seemed to not even be aware of the fact that there actually was nowhere to sit as every surface was covered with the flotsam of the all-nighter she was pulling.

Looking around, Miles will find the 'emptiest' spot of floor, and collapse into sitting with his legs crossed, staring at his own padd. Without looking up he'll ask, "we got any spare console pieces and parts laying around in storage that I can play around with rather than using a holodeck? after watching what happened to the bridge consoles, I have a few ideas I'd like to tinker with in my spare time."

Stephanie looked up from the PADD, clearly puzzled. "An' what's wrong wit' th' Holodeck?" She asked. "Spare parts are at a premium right now," She said. "I've a crew rebuildin' th' bridge consoles t' factory spec as we speak. I'd like to keep what we do have on hand in th' event that we th' Borg come t' darken our doorstep again... Unless ya've an industrial replicator hidden in th' crack o' yer arse." She went back to her PADD.

Miles good-natured laugh rolls out into Main Engineering. "No my good lady, I am trying to keep our consoles from blowing up and from causing shrapnel damage when they do go 'BOOM,' this was something I started contemplating at the academy and have now seen may need to come full circle."

"If yer gonna blow shite up, I'd much prefer ya do it in th' holodeck. Things explodin' makes me look bad," O'Hara sighed

"It's not me you gotta worry about, its the Borg, the Breen, the Klingons, should I keep going, heck even my own people like shooting at Starfleet ships, thus causing things to go boom."

"Who is blowing what up?" Saren asked as he walked in.

Miles will look up and smile at Saren, "Just me razzing Chief O'Hara for waking me up this early, well kinda razzing I guess, as her idea for me to go to the holodeck to play with my ideas may have to become reality..."

"Good. Yer're here," Stephanie said, forgetting Miles was asking her for something and just launched right into the explanation for summoning them both here. "So you, Mista Rejal, gave me an idea th' other day, and I've been up researchin' it. I need some other brains t' bounce it offa. I've been studyin' th' Borg incursion on Stardate 43989.1 when Jean-Luc Picard was assimilated by the Borg an' turned inta Locutus. Th' Android, Lieutenant Commanda Data was able t' use Picard's link t' th' Collective t' access th' Borg's command pathways an' shut them down. Th' reason Data didn't get overwhelmed by th' experience because his brain is basically a computer... But when ya get down t' brass tacks, sou are ours... Jus' a diffrent kind. Direct yer attention t' the wall behind th' desk, please."

The wall console behind the desk lit up and showed a visual record from the Enterprise's Robotics lab, showcasing Locutus and Data with ODN cables wired into their heads.

"Th' reason I didn't wanna plug inta th' Collective is because I was scared of gettin' lost in there... But I got t' thinkin'. th' subspace signals didn't overwhelm Data is because his positronic brain was able t' compartmentalize an' it buffered him so th' signal from th' collective didn' overwhelm his personality." She continued. "So what we need t' do is find a way t' compartmentalize an' buffer my human brain from th' collective an' I should be able t' access th' Borg collective th' same way Data did... So I think I can do th' same thing... But I need a layer between us. A sorta neutral zone between my mind an' th collective. I based the idea off an old concept called a "Virtual Private Network". Th' idea is that if you pass network traffic through a third party server, then it looks like it's coming from there and you can't trace it back to it's source. So what if we plug th' borg into one side of the VPN, an' me inta th' other. Then I get to be like a tourist. I can read th' traffic, but I can't interact with it an' it can' interact wit' me. Then we can find out why th' bloody hell they're after killin' us... " She took a deep breath. When she was talking excitedly. "But here's th' catch. We need a live one."

"Why don't we just dump the drones information into a portable storage device, that you can go through with more safeties in place and forego having to hear you say we're all going to be assimilated?"

"Because it wouldn't be th' same data. If I gave you a list of instructions they wouldn't mean much without context. If you do a data dump on a wall console, ye'll na get th' same data as ya would if you did a dump o' th' computer core." She shrugged. "The point o' needin' a live one is t' access th' command pathways and see what their current malfunction is. "

Miles stands up and walks to a wall panel, "Computer, are there any medical records of the Federation successfully sedating a live Borg Drone?" The computer thinks for a few moments and then replies, in her sweet voice, "That information requires a security clearance above your level." Miles bows his head, and growls something in Klingon (a very very derogatory comment towards the computer). "Ok, so what if we beamed a drone off the cube from their regeneration alcove - doing so might make it easier for us to either restrain it, or it may stay unaware of our actions...whatdaya think of that plan?"

Stephanie made a sour face at Miles. "It may be beyond your clearance, but it's not beyond mine," She stood and walked over to her desk, withdrawing a small metal sphere from the top drawer. "Give me 2 minutes," She said as she walked back over and flopped back into the beanbag chair. She fitted the smaller disc into her data port and closed her eyes.

Miles will smile at Saren, "Isn't that called cheating?" He will calmly await to see what information O'Hara the Hacker can dig out of the main computer.

Without opening her eyes, O'Hara responded "No. It's creative use of available resources an' skill sets." After a few moments, she opened her eyes, picked up a PADD and turned it over, then handed it to Miles. "I've been working on this for hours. I'll be damned if I let a little thing like Security Clearances slow me down now... Not that we really need t' know how t' sedate a Borg. We're gonna need t' beam it directly t' Sick Bay and use a surgical restrainin' field t' keep it immobile and sedate the shite out of it while we work. Th' sickbay staff can handle that. Either way, at best, I lay 50/50 odds th' collective notices a drone missin' and come a callin'... An' don' care much f'r tha' spread."

Miles will take the padd and share whats on it with Saren while muttering to him under his breath, "Chief O'Hara is Wonder Woman in disguise, shhhh don't tell anyone."

"I prefer Mary Poppins. I am, after all, practically perfect in every way," O'Hara shot back without missing a beat with a sly grin. "But the question here is how d' we increase those odds in our favor. That's what I need ya boys for. How d' we stop our new drone friend from contactin' th' Collective as soon as we nab 'em an' bringin' fury cubed down upon us?"

Miles will look at the info and smile, "Thanks Ms. Poppins. As to how we stop him from communicating with his friends, we jam his signals. We must know what frequencies their chatter sends and recieves on, we build a jamming device so he cant talk to anyone but us. It sound't be too hard, as many races have been jamming each others signals for centuries."

Miles suddenly stops talking, and he gets that blank, the gears are working overtime look on his face again. He turns to look at Saren, "What if we convert our holodeck to look like the inside of the Borg cube and beam the drone and his regeneration chamber there. We can simulate the 'chatter' they use to keep it calm, so that Ms Poppins here can talk to it without raising any alarms..."

"Perhaps yer overthinkin' it," Stephanie said. "Do all Cardassians have a habit o' missin' a hundred percent o' th' point or is it jus' you?" She rolled her eyes. "I don' care if th' knows where he is. We jus' have t' make sure he can' tell his friends. Which means we have t' find an effective way t' neutralize any subspace signals he sends."

Miles smiles, "Overthinking the issue is a problem I have, one that was pointed out to me at the Academy by several professors. Ok, so let me back up then. We configure a jammer of some kind. One that keeps him from talking to his friends, but that lets you sneak in and download data...is that better?"

"Jesus Harold Christ onna whole wheat cracker, Miles! D' I need t' sing it t' ya?" O'Hara sounded annoyed. She launched into the short version because Miles obviously wasn't picking up what she was putting down, speaking in a condescending tone of voice, as if she were explaining it to a child. "Step One. We erect a subspace barrier around Sickbay. Step two. Beam a Drone directly inta' a surgical restraint. Step three. One o' the medics sedates th' ever-lovin' feck outta our new Bee-Ef-Ef. Step four. I plug both o' us in to the VPN an' drop th' barrier."

"Oh man why didn't I think of that...oh yah, did you ask the Chief Medical Officer if we could turn his sickbay into a warzone by dropping a Borg drone in his lap, just wondering." Miles will shake his head, and start out of main engineering, then stop, "If you need help with the coding, or the schmoozing up the doctor's let me know." And exit stage right Mr Miles who's head is already full of a whole buncha other stuff from earlier in his shift...

Stephanie shrugged. "Imma go talk with th' Captain later. All o' this is a moot point unless we have his seal o' approval


Lt JG Marbim "Miles" Rejal
Chief of Operations
USS Merlin

LTjg Stephanie O'Hara
Chief Engineer
USS Merlin

LTjg Saren Barel
Chief Science Officer
USS Merlin

 

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