A Change in Dreams

Posted on Monday 17 October 2016 @ 23:16 by Lieutenant JG Martin Landau

486 words; about a 2 minute read

The nightmare has changed to where I keep replaying the year from hell aboard the USS Nottingham. The ship is in a seriously damaged state almost like its a write off and Im standing there looking at the destruction on the bridge staring out into the abuss that was the viewscreen into hell. I feel as if its all my fault and that I feel guilty but i'm still staring out in to the gaping hole of blackness listening to things behind me explode all around the bridge. The captain laying on the ground dead and lifeless with other bridge crew dead around the deck it feels quite cold and dark like some kind of horror movie scene but as i turn around I feel this arm on my shoulder to turn and see the dead arisin and chanting its your fault its all your fault over and over.

I toss and turn in bed muttering things with sweat dripping from my body but I also feel cold inside the images playing over and over again of crew members faces chanting and pointing body's disfigured and burnt standing there like they where alive again. It suddenly moves to where the forcefield fails andim holding on to the console for dear life as im eventually sucked out and i wake up heart racing pulse elevated and dripping in sweat but my mind keeps playing the mission while im still awake with the nightmare element added in to make the mission change to what I remeber it to becomming very dark and twisted to which I wish these nightmares would go away but they change every so often.

I feel I need to find some kind of way of getting rid of these nightmares without going to see a councelor or someone of that ability I need to work it out on my own. Two to four hours sleep is not much but its what Centaurians are good at but its still troublesome sleep even with that amount of sleep is all we need to sustain ourselves but its becomes boring after a while trying to find things to do waiting for duty shifts to come around walking around a ship bored and without ideas or motives to do anything. One time I bored a senior officer to death myself bored taking it out on the officer him then eventualy telling me to go away so I sometimesleep on duty even if its on duty or in the room when im not on shift anything to keep me sane and not bored to high hell. Sometimes I even do a whole days shift spending an hour here and there a sleep next to a desk in a sleeping bag or sleeping in a jefferies tube in the sleeping bag anyhting to stay same alerting the crewmember on shit to wake me at a certain time and so forth

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